


How To Court Your Resident Half-Ghoul From Wikihow!

by VariousStories123



Series: Love By Uta, Yomo, and Kaneki [1]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Uta and Yomo have no idea how this works, Wikihow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-30 04:40:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6409189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VariousStories123/pseuds/VariousStories123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Yomo and Uta like Kaneki and Wikihow is here to help them out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How To Court Your Resident Half-Ghoul From Wikihow!

Step 1: Get to Know Them as a Friend

Kaneki is wiping the counter when Yomo sidles up to him before asking him point blank what his favorite color was. Kaneki looked at him, one eye filled to the brim with confusion but he shrugged. “Blue,” Kaneki replied, thinking of sunny skies and good times. “I like the color blue.”  


Step 2: Learn About His/Her Family

It is Uta who finds out.  
He’s always had a knack for finding out information and he digs through police files, detective files, even CGG ones.  
What he finds, makes his Kagune burst out and has him going out on a eating spree. When his rampage is over, he talks to Yomo.  
Together they piece a tale of a young boy who didn’t know what abuse was, thought hits were good and help was bad. They weave the story of a boy turned teen who lived with an aunt who treated him like dirt. They make this monstrosity of a story and then they go hunting.  
They can’t kill his mother but they can kill his aunt.  
It is a good hunt.  


Step 3: Be Upfront With Him/Her

Kaneki sighed as he started to change out of his work gear, changing out of his shirt first and grabbing his regular clothing. As he started to put it on-  
SLAM!  
Kaneki jumped, eyes wide and one eye sparkling black and red. Yomo stood in front of him, face unusually red. “I like you.”  
“W-What?”  
Yomo flushed even harder, although his face was stotic as always. Suddenly he turned on his heel, leaving Kaneki alone.  
“...What was that about?”  


Step 4: Ask His/Her Father

“I want to date Kaneki.”  
Yoshimura stared at the rather strong ghoul in front of him before asking carefully, “And why are you asking me Uta?”  
Uta nodded as if it were a valid question before digging inside his pocket and pulling out his phone. He fiddled with it for a minute or so before giving it to Yoshimura.  
“Is this… Is this the American’s Wikihow?”  
“Yes. It’s working well so far.”  


Step 5: Romance and Woo Him/Her

Kaneki screamed as he opened his door, face paling. Yomo and Uta stood in front of him along with bodies.  
Five to be exact.  
Uta looked at Yomo with a curious expression, “Screams means he likes it right?”  
Yomo shrugged as Kaneki kept on hyperventilating, “I think so. That’s what I saw on some TV shows.”  
Uta nodded sagely before glancing at Kaneki who was now yelling at them in a rather unKaneki-like voice. “He must really like it then.”  


Step 6: Cherish Him/Her

“U-Uta-san, Yomo-san… You’re telling me you used Wikihow to- to try and court me?”  
“Hai~”  
“Un.”  
Kaneki looked flabbergasted and he blinked for a moment, eyes wide. He blushed before looking up shyly from underneath the lashes of his eyes. “Y-You know.. You could have just told me.”  
Springing up with a rather light foot, he kissed each of them on the cheek before blushing harder and running away, hands on his cheeks.  
Yomo and Uta looked at each other before running after him.  
Wikihow had served them well.  


It is a couple years later when they get “married”. They survived a multitude of things from Kaneki being tortured by Yamori, Kaneki’s “death” by Arima, Kaneki’s new identity of “Haise”.  
There is suffering and pain and yet there is beauty and grace and for Uta and Yomo, Wikihow is always there to help them out.  
Kaneki, married and happy, says that it is silly and that Wikipedia doesn’t help.  
He holds his chin when he says this.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, I'm not really sure how to use the AO3 formatting so it might look a little weird. If you want to see a cleaner version, you can go on my fanfiction site which goes by the same name. Thank you!


End file.
